Ep: #24 - Eating Out While Trying to Lose Weight with the 5 D's of Action™

Faye Casement Author

Mar 22, 2023 |

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I don't know about you but when I was on one of the many 'diets' I had been on eating out was a minefield. I wanted to be social and enjoy time with friends, family or my partner but it was always tainted by 'the diet'.

I would agonise over what I would eat, what were the calories, how many points was it, and how was this going to impact my weight loss?

My self-confidence internally was also on the floor. I would worry about what I would wear, how I would look, and what people would think of me.

What should have been a simple thing, a great thing, going out with people I loved and enjoying myself became so complicated and it would make me miserable and sometimes not want to go.

I have had times when my self-esteem and everything I had going on led to depression.

I could feel so low and so self-conscious I would say no to going to meetups, parties and events. Sadly, I have lost touch with good friends over this which makes me sad.

If I made it out I would be worried about what I was eating, be tempted by off-plan items, worry about whether people were judging my looks, what I said, what I ate. It was totally exhausting and not much fun!.

Afterwards would come the guilt and shame... "I shouldn't have eaten that", "I shouldn't have said that" and so it would spiral... "I will never lose weight", "I have no willpower", "I am useless", "Why bother"!. Simply painful!

This constant brain chatter and diet drama coming up day after day, meal after meal, outing after outing! Not something I want to repeat.

In this blog, I am going to focus on the food side of this story.

- Do you feel like you blow your 'diet' every time you go out to eat?

- Do you feel pressure to make 'good' decisions?

- Do you struggle to resist when presented with large portions, puddings, drinks/cocktails?

- Do you find yourself so distracted with brain chatter you are not really present?

- Do you have a ton of guilt/shame about eating out?

- Do you feel pressured by others when out to go off track?

Any of those come up for you? 

If so, this blog is for you!

What if told you, you can take down the temperature on the food drama for a more peaceful weight loss journey?

What if I told you it is possible to make choices that will help you stay on track with your goals and also enjoy yourself.

I am going to run you through how my 5 D's of Action process can help. I created a handy printable reminder document grab it HERE

So first of all what are the 5 D's of Action™ they are:

Decide - Do - Discover - Deal - Do again

So first up...

DECIDE

Making a decision is what takes down the chatter. We get so caught up thinking about what we should or should not do and it is exhausting. The key is to make a decision and move forward. You can always change it but making that initial decision helps to take the pressure off.

Weight loss in its simplest form, which is what I advocate, is simply a series of decisions. That is it. You make one tiny decision after another and another and you will get to your goal.

So what decisions do we need to make when eating out:

Are you going to be "on plan" or "off plan". So what do I mean by this? Well simply. Do you want to try and show up for yourself or are you not going to try and just let it happen. I do not advocate the use of the work treat day/meal, or cheat day/meal because it makes out those activities/foods are good or bad which gives rise to diet drama and puts certain foods on a pedestal.

For a peaceful weight loss process, you want to try and get rid of the drama so banning those words helps. Plus if you follow a simple system there is nothing to cheat from as every day is so easy!

Again the reality is you are simply making a decision do you want to take some steps that may serve your weight loss or not. The key is to assess this coldly with zero judgement. It is fine to want to go with the flow but you have to own the decision.

Alternatively, maybe you do want to still work on your weight loss. What are you going to do? Just like talked about a few weeks again you are going to make a realistic commitment to yourself.

So what do I mean by this?

There is absolutely no point whatsoever saying to yourself you will eat salad and drink water when you know that as soon as you are out with your mates you are knee-deep in pina colada (my favourite!) and kebabs. If you do manage to stick to it you will feel restricted and if you don't you will end up in a shame spiral.

You know what happens when you go out and if not this is where I teach you how to gather awareness. You know your patterns.

So think. What can you really commit to right now?

Maybe it is 10 pina Coladas and half kebab and chips.

Next time you could stretch to 9 pina coladas, 1/2 kebab no chips.

Each time you make a little decision that you achieve you celebrate.

Each time you gather a win you can say to yourself this is soooo easy and you will gather momentum.

This is just one example of what you can do when eating out. I have many other tips and tricks to share on this in the membership and you get access to coaching before, after, and hell you could even get it during the meal if you needed it!

To give a sneaky peak though it can involve things like:

- Picking a venue you may find it easy to make a 'better' choice in.
- Making a plan ahead of time.
- Enlisting a supporter.
- Mindful eating techniques.
- Special mind ninjary techniques.
- Working on IE for portion control.
- Awareness of social pressures.
- Knowing your triggers.
- Urges and cravings.

DO

So next you are going to do. Pretty obvious really this one. You have to try and do what you decided to.

So with each decision, we make there is an action step. I advocate and have covered in previous pieces of training/blogs and above the importance of small action steps so as said about the decision ideally should be realistic, doable and easy.

DISCOVER

So you are doing it!

Notice what is coming up for you, you can do this before, during and after but you want to look at what happened.

Did you decide to have a free for all? What thoughts, feelings, actions and results did this lead to?

Did you make a plan, and did you stick to it? If yes celebrate, if no why not and what can you learn and try next time?

This is critical.

It is critical you also do it with curiosity, kindness and that share it with others.

DEAL

This is where my mind ninjary module comes into it.

You are human.

You will have thoughts and feelings about what happened.

Our thoughts, lead to our feelings, lead to our actions leads to results. 

This is the main model I teach and how you can use it in life and weight loss as well as teaching other tools.

If you didn't make a plan or stick to it you will likely need to be able to recognise if you are in a guilt/shame spiral. You will need tools on how to get out of it.

Maybe you did exactly what you said you were going to do. You feel on top of the world. You have got this weight loss thing in the back (brilliant thought by the way) but you would want to then check-in for secondary thoughts... "I was so good yesterday today this extra biscuit won't matter", "I was so good yesterday I deserve this "treat" today".

DO AGAIN

I said early how weight loss is just a series of decisions. So yep you are going to have to rinse and repeat the cycle. Keep doing it, keep showing up, keep figuring out and you will lose your weight as well as finding food and life freedom if you follow the whole Triple-A-Way™ Framework.

RECAP

In this blog I have given you a whistlestop tour of one way you could look to eat out while trying to lose weight.

I have given you an overview of one of the many tools I have in the membership for you to use in your life and weight loss journey.

Key takeaways:

- Eating out doesn't have to mean giving up on your goals,
- Weight loss is just a series of decisions,
- You can follow the 5 D's Process for any life and weight loss problem,
- It is possible to eat out and lose weight,
- You can have a more peaceful weight loss process by learning to reduce the diet chatter in your brain with mind ninjary.

Want to get started on losing weight for the last time? 

Check out the Triple-A-Way™️ Membership HERE.

Come join the Wellness4Women Facebook Group where you can watch the live video to accompany this blog plus catch other free training, resources, useful tips and connect to a community of women just like you!.

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Categories: : Weight loss